Micha Tales: #2

Another edition of Micha Tales from Stephen Dodd, head cheese at Black Type White Paper, an Edmonton DTP firm. The sad thing about this particular installment is that it sounds just so ... me, as surely anybody who has even spent half an hour going anywhere with me in real life will know.


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Prolog
Michelle likes to wave at people. This is a fact. The recipients are generally people whom she has never set eyes upon before this moment. This is not always a Good Thing, however.

[Michelle Waving (GIF)]

Michelle Doing the Siufai Wave

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Episode 1: The Car Wave. Waving at people in other cars is often safe and sometimes they even wave back instead of getting confused and veering into lamp-posts. One time, though, a guy in an old red pickup truck got a bit too excited about this blue-eyed blonde waving at him. He started to follow us.

[Redneck American and his Truck (GIF)]
Redneck American Standing by His Truck

Now this is your typical beer guzzling, American apple-pie kinda pickuptrucker dude -- the kind that likes shotguns enough to carry them around illegally in their red American pickups. Drive, drive. Follow, follow.

Well, he finally pulled up beside us so we did what any person would do in a situation like this: I rolled down my window and we started talking to him in French:

"Âllo, nous venons du Québec," I started.
"Est-ce que tu peux nous aider?" Michelle chimed in.
"Nous cherchons Sherwood Park."
"Oui, oui. Pouvons-nous journer avec toi?"
And on it went until his brain overheated and he ran. This was a Good Thing.

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Episode 2. The Bar Wave. So we're walking past this bar and suddenly Michelle has her face pressed to the glass. What's more she is waving enthusiastically to the people inside. It's obvious by their expressions that none have ever seen her before. This is no deterrent however and the nice bar-people end up inviting us inside where, in a mild beer-haze, they proceed to get just slightly too friendly. Wave goodbye to the nice bar-flies. Bye-bye.

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Episode 3. The Dark Ravine.
We spend a lot of time in a dark, woodsy ravine in Edmonton, Alberta, called Mill Creek. It's pretty safe because few people are stupid enough to go down there in the middle of the night and all the muggers are hanging around safer, more populated spots.

[The Ravine Back Home (GIF)]
The Ravine Back Home

This night there were people in the ravine. Across a clearing Michelle spots several dark silhouettes of people and takes off in a mad charge, waving feverishly. It's dark, it's remote, and I'm watching Michelle charge what is likely -- in my mind -- several Hell's Angels out for a stroll. Either that or it's some peaceful seniors with heart problems.

[Stephen Running Scared (GIF)]
Stephen Running Scared

Did you ever hear about the story of the hiker and the dog that goes out and finds the wolverine and comes running back to Daddy with Wolvie in tow? I had.

Good thing I'm an adrenaline junkie.

-Stephen Dodd

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Michelle A. Hoyle
Micha Tales: #2, Created: June 24, 1997